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Sprite’s Money Shot (NSFW….. ?)

July 21, 2009

Just 24 hours into the fizz biz’s festival of raunch, and Sprite’s money-shot, “banned in Germany” but heard ’round the world, has been yanked from YouTube – “This video is no longer available due to a trademark claim by a third party,” they claim, and according to sources (including the comments section of the Huffington Post), both the ad and the claim of its German ban are fake – spec work by some Brooklyn hacks. For the mo’, tho’, you can gaze enraptured upon the entire pornucopia on (click the image for link):


For the prudent souls amid our prurient bodies, a precis: a prime specimen of Barely Legal-like nubility is depicted engaged in loving oral copulation with a young and engorgedly virile black man. “I could really go for a Sprite right now,” she thinks. “Oh my God,” echoes the blonde as she gazes upon a Spritely tumescence, and that foamy bottle of LemonLime delivers her a facial of such force that Peter North will forever have to up his game. Cut to a can of Sprite: “OBEY YOUR THIRST,” reads the legend; we cut back to the young blonde, whose tongue wags with foamy goodness in classic post-popshot piquancy.

How far we’ve come! (Pun not intended: for pun to achieve intention, check out Cytherea.) So many taboos penetrated, and yet the tail hardly wags this dog! Teenage interracial lollypopping, check. Fear of the Black Phallus, check. Sex bumping its uglies with Selling, check. If the chick were preggers, now that would be something – but without the bun in the oven, our outrage is only half-baked in our great state of Pornification.

Behind the glazed visage of adolescent wankery, we come to the point of the matter: the greasy palm of promotion makes all of us actors and consumers of the pornographic industry. It should make us uncomfortable, but still we eagerly lap up this cultural foam. With a rebel yell, we cry,

“More, more, more!”



The Day Obscenity Became Art (NYT)

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